I Can Love Myself This Way

This afternoon I sat staring at the reflection of the 40 year old woman who is me. Lines. I saw lines. Around my mouth, between my brows, across my forehead. Where did they come from? How do they seem to grow deeper by the day? When did I become so old?

This afternoon I sat staring at the reflection of the 40 year old woman who is me. Lines. I saw lines. Around my mouth, between my brows, across my forehead. Where did they come from? How do they seem to grow deeper by the day? When did I become so old? Botox. Maybe that’s what I need. I was covering the gray today; why not hide everything else that reveals my aging body?

The #judgement stopped me. I thought of my mom. With locks of lovely spun silver. Crevices around her mouth from which laughter spills. Crinkles surrounding her eyes deep with love. Wrinkles trolling across a forehead embracing a #mind of #intelligence and #wisdom.

I look like my mom. I look like the beauty who bore me. I am becoming the woman who never has tried to be anyone or anything else.

So it is. I can love myself this way. I WILL love myself this way. I’ll look at this image with tenderness and #grace. I’ll ask gently for the preoccupations with perfection to be lifted.

I’ll practice loving you, as you are and as you will be, I said to myself and smiled.